A Visit From the Avengers!
by L1701E
Summary: Chapter 10 up! Complete! The teenage Avengers pay a visit to the X-Men! Review all the insanity! RR PLEASE! Suggestions needed badly!
1. The Avengers Arrive!

**A Visit from the Avengers!**

**Hey folks! L1701E here! In my story "Breakfast with the Avengers", the teenage members of Earth's Mightiest Heroes (Kid Razor, She-Hulk, Tigra, Hawkeye and Thor), visited the X-Men alongside all the other insanity that happened when they went out partying one night. Here is that visit.**

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Marvel Comics except originals. **

Chapter 1: The Avengers arrive!

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(Xavier Institute, 8pm)

"For _once_, a quiet night." Scott Summers smiled as several of the X-Men enjoyed a rare quiet night. Storm sat in a chair with a smile, reading a book, duct tape on her lap. She had recently duct-taped Shipwreck, a member of the GI Joe team who had a crush on her, to City Hall. It would take him a week to get down. And another Joe who had a thing for her, an Englishman codenamed Bulldog, was drying out in jail after a loud night out with Warren, Airtight, Barbecue, and Recondo. Scott scowled at a yelling Foxfire.

"No no **no****!**" Jason Fox exclaimed. "I can't believe it! I **still** can't believe it! No way! Chris Benoit beat HBK!! No way!" The orange-haired Detroit native was watching a DVD of Wrestlemania XX. Jason was born with orange hair, but it was tipped with white and when it was in his famous ponytail, it looked like a fox's tail.

"Benoit beat him, Fox! Deal with it!" Tabitha Smith snapped. She, Danielle Moonstar, Sam Guthrie, and Roberto DaCosta were playing Monopoly.

"Fox, Ah wanna watch mah DVD! It's **mah** turn!" Rogue snapped, holding up a DVD of the new version of Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

"Back off, Scarlet O'Hara!" Fox snapped. "I'm gonna watch Wrestlemania I after this!"

"You have a portable DVD player in your room! Now move out!" Rogue ordered.

"Kiss my perfect butt. You'd love that, wouldn't you?" Fox smirked, bringing down his red shades. With an annoyed scream, Rogue stopped the event, and pulled out the DVD. She proceeded to crush it. "HEY!! You Southern inbred redneck %$#&! That cost me thirty bucks!"

"Tough, Fox!" Rogue snapped back.

"You're asking for a superkick, Goth girl!" Fox snapped.

"And you're askin' to lose that smile you like so much!" Rogue raised her fist.

"Hey calm down!" Beast and Jean held them back.

"That redneck owes me a DVD!"

"That Motor City Moron needs to learn to shut his fat mouth!" Rogue snarled.

"Maybe you need to stay away from each other for a while." Jean sighed.

"Tough to do, Jean." Fox grinned. "Rogue keeps 'visiting' me every night." With an enraged scream, Rogue tackled Fox and they started brawling. A knock was heard at the door.

"I'll get it." Scott went to the door. _It can't be the Misfits. They **never** use the door, and both teams are currently busy._ The cycloptic mutant got his answer when the door hit the wall, taking him with it! "OW!"

"ALOHA, X-Dudes!" Kid Razor laughed as he marched in the door. He was clad in his regular costume. "The Avengers have arrived!" Tigra leapt in, clad like a clubber/otaku: A black Sailor Moon t-shirt, a Hello Kitty backpack, pink sunglasses, a glowing necklace, and pink jean shorts, and white sneakers.

"Hi!" She grinned. "I'm here! Yay! Anything to eat?"

"Airhead." Razor muttered.

"Hey, give us a hand here!" Clint Barton snapped. The blond boy, clad in a purple t-shirt with a blue button-down shirt over it and jeans was helping hold up a staggering Thor. Also helping was Jenny Walters, clad in a red dress.

"What happened to Thor?" Dani asked.

"Someone spiked his drink, babe." Razor chuckled. "Hey Moonstar…" Razor whispered something into Danielle's ear. The offended Cherokee girl tried to use her powers on the Ultimate Rockstar.

"Hey! How come my powers don't affect you?!" Dani exclaimed.

"I don't feel fear, babe." Razor winked. "I don't get scared. Nice try though, babe."

"Do you call all the girls that?" Dani asked.

"Just the pretty ones." Razor smirked. Dani rolled her eyes as she walked off. "What? It's a compliment!"

"Hey Razor, wanna hear something cool?" Rogue said.

"Sure thing. If it's about Nerd-Boy and being abducted by aliens, I already know."

"No, about Jean." Rogue smirked. "Ah thought since you are a rockstar, you **had** to know about this."

"What, that you're in love with Starchild? All you X-Chicks are!" Razor rolled his eyes.

"No, about Jean. She once was kidnapped by Cobra and sent to a brothel." Rogue laughed. And so did Razor.

"Let me guess, she felt right at home!" Razor laughed.

"Well, not exactly!" Rogue laughed. "Nothing happened, but Scott got freaked out."

_Hmm…I could use this…_Razor mentally smirked. "Excuse me, but I heard Scott has a nice car. I want to check it out."

"In the garage." Rogue shrugged. Razor walked off to the garage.

"What happened to Thor?" Jean asked Clint and Jennifer.

"Some knucklehead spiked his soda. Now he's inebriated." Jenny sighed.

"I slayed the Frost Giants…" Thor mumbled.

"I never thought gods could get plastered." Clint chuckled. Scott groaned as he managed to remove himself from the wall.

"Why here? We were having a nice night." Scott whined.

"We never got to visit recently, so we thought we'd say hello." Clint chuckled. An explosion was heard outside.

"What was that?" Storm asked.

"Hey Summers!" Razor snapped as he walked. "You suck! You have no respect for the automobile! You can't care for a care worth squat! Luckily, I was able to fix it up for you." Scott's face paled.

"What'd you do to my car, Razor?" Scott asked in a panic. There was no love lost between the mutant with the laser eyes and the rocker with the magic guitar. It was common knowledge they didn't like each other. "Razor…RAZOR…What did you do to my car?"

"I fixed it." Razor shrugged nonchalantly. Scott ran outside. He ran to the garage and was horrified by what he saw.

"**_MY CAR!!!_**" Scott screamed. The car was a wreck. The engine was nothing but twisted metal, obviously someone blasted it with an energy beam. What was left of the body was painted pink, and the words "The man who drives this car moonlights as a town drunk" scrawled on the windshield. Scott fell on his knees in front of the wreck. "My car…My car…My car…My car…My car…"

"What'd you do to Scott's car?" Storm asked Razor. Razor shrugged.

"I fixed it." Razor chuckled.

"What were you Avengers doing?" Hank asked.

"We went out partying." Tigra grinned. "We beat Ultron so we went out to celebrate." She looked at Beast. "You look like a big blue teddy bear."

"I've been called a lot of things, but never a big blue teddy bear." Beast blinked.

"Hey rocker boy!" Tabby waved at Razor. "Jubilee sent a lot of e-mails here asking if you ever come here and visit."

"Tell that crazy chick that I never visit." Razor groaned.

_Oops._ Tabby blinked. _I'm…gonna get blasted for this._

"We fought the Absorbing Man, then ran into a bunch of FOH rednecks!" Clint grumbled.

"I mean, the nerve!" Jenny sniffed. "What a bunch of jerks! I mean just because I have mutant friends does not make _me_ a mutant!"

"Jenny, you're green." Sam reminded. Jenny smirked.

"**Gorgeous** and green, Bullet Boy. And don't you forget it." Jen laughed. "By the way, I heard you're dating that rocker. Lila Cheney, right?"

"We're not dating. She has a thing for me and enjoys chasing me around." Sam sighed.

"You don't complain when she kidnaps you to her little blue planet." Roberto chuckled.

"Shut up, Sunspot." Sam grumbled.

"Okay, let me get this straight." Storm sighed. "You Avenger kids come to visit after a long night of partying. Thor's soda got spiked, so now he's drunk, and who knows what Kid Razor did to Scott's car."

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(The Xavier Institute Garage)

"My car…My car…My car…My car…My car…My car…"

Hoo brother! Looks like the X-Men are in for a night of madness! What insanity will happen next? Will Thor sober up? Will Scott recover from the sight of his 'Razor-ified' car? Will Xavier be sued again? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	2. A Quick Brawl in the Mall!

**A Visit From the Avengers!**

To Wizard1: Yeah well, Kid Razor just wanted to really irk Scott today. Well, as for Thor's spiked drink, it may have been Loki or Amora or somebody. And Rogue maybe found it funny to tell Razor the old whorehouse story. After all, she promised not to tell the other X-Men. Doesn't mean she can't say anything about it to the Avengers. You also have to understand Tigra has a messed-up head. She probably still thinks that Logan's a puppy. Oh yeah, and when does the new chapter of 'Karaoke Dance Party' come up? I can't wait for more singing and insanity! PLEASE PUT IT UP!!!!

To Red Witch: Yeah, ol' Shiny McBaldy will have to whip out the ol' checkbook. He's going to need it, Red! Oh, I went to an antique shop on Tuesday and I got something real sweet! A copy of the old GI Joe comic! Great, huh? Here's more insanity for you and have fun in Maine! Razor wants you to get some lobsters for him!

Chapter 2: A Quick Brawl in the Mall!

**(Xavier Institute)**

"Yeah, I know! Man, that was _insane!_ Reminds me of the time I went up to that truck stop in space." Jennifer Walters blabbed into a telephone. The Sensational She-Hulk was engaging in one of her hobbies: Gossip.

"Um, Jennifer…" Xavier tried to speak to her. Jenny held out her hand, raising her index finger in a 'hang-on-a-sec' gesture. The bald professor sighed.

"Uh-huh…" Jenny nodded. "Oh my God! You don't say! Yeah! Oh, cool! I **love** that movie! Oh, I'd gladly date Owen Wilson! I'm going to bring Clint, Thor, Razor, and Greer with me to the movie. Don't worry, Tigra won't get hyper. We'll make sure she gets no candy." Xavier groaned, and he noticed a familiar staple of visits from Earth's Mightiest Heroes: Logan leaping about on one foot and violently shaking the other foot.

"TIGRA!!! GET OFF ME!!!" Logan yelled, trying to shake off the werecat, who had a death grip on his leg. "LET GO!!!" _What made this loony cat-girl think I'm a friggin' puppy?! I'm flamin' glad Miko isn't here to see this! When Tigra pulled this on Christmas **(1)**, Jinx thought this was frickin' hilarious! Then, she starts askin' me about children! Man, I don't need this! I got a freakin' reputation to uphold!_

**(1) See the story "Christmas Chaos!"**

"You do have a way with children, Logan." Ororo chuckled as she saw Logan leap around.

"Can't you blast her with some lightning or something?!" Logan roared. "Get off me, you psychotic hairball!"

"WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" Greer squealed.

"Told you she was an airhead." Kid Razor chuckled. Jenny smirked and put her hand on the receiver.

"If she's such an airhead, then how come she regularly beats you when Jeopardy is on TV?!?!" The She-Hulk laughed.

"Oh shut up Walters!" Razor snapped.

"Thank you for helping me get Thor to the infirmary where he can rest up, Rogue. Clint." Hank thanked as they walked in.

"Whatever." Rogue shrugged.

"Yeah sure." Clint grinned.

"Ah can't help but wonder about that drink Thor got spiked with. Thor _is_ a god, you know." Rogue reminded.

"Yeah." Hank nodded, putting a finger to his chin. "It would have to take something pretty powerful to get Thor inebriated."

"Maybe it's one of Thor's enemies in Asgard. He was quite a few." Clint said. "His half-brother Loki, the former Norse God of Mischief, now God of Evil. Loki's a whiny little brat who wants to rule Asgard. Amora, the Enchantress. Kid Razor's flirted with her a couple times. She's one crazy sorceress. She wants to rule Asgard, too. And they're only two of the people who'd love to see Thor embarrass himself."

"Sounds like Thor doesn't have too many friends back in Asgard." Rogue raised an eyebrow.

"He's got Sif and Balder the Brave." Clint shrugged. "They're demi-gods or something. I dunno."

"The Frost Giants shall fall!" Thor roared from the infirmary. A crash was heard from the infirmary.

"Uh oh." The three heroes said together. They scrambled back to the infirmary and found a big Thor-shaped hole in the wall. "Uh oh."

"What's up?" Razor asked as he peeked in the room. "Uh oh. Delusional Thunder God on the loose. Not good. Not good at all." The Ultimate Rockstar smirked. "I feel sorry for anyone who angers that crazy dude, heh heh."

**Xavier Institute Garage**

"My car…My car…My car…My car…My car…" Scott whimpered as he stood on his knees in front of his car, which was wrecked by Kid Razor. "My car…My car…My car…My car…My car…My car…"

**Bayville Mall**

Several of Bayville's jocks, including Duncan Matthews, were sitting at a table, joking about the usual stuff football players joked about, as well as tried to figure out how the fork, knife, and spoon worked.

"Hey Duncan, check out the weirdo." One player pointed at a confused-looking Thor. He wandered around the mall, constantly looking around, causing some people to murmur and whisper as well as watch. Duncan smirked.

"I'll bet he's a mutie. I'll check it out." Duncan got up. "Hey pal! What's with the stupid get-up?"

"Get-up?" Thor looked down at his costume. He appeared to be slurring slightly. "I do not understand."

"Oh look, he's a **dumb** mutie." Duncan laughed.

"You mean…a mutant?" Thor slurred slightly. "Apologies mortal, but I am no mutant."

"Yeah man, he's right! I've seen him on the news, Duncan!" Another player realized. "He's one of them Avengers! That's Thor! He's a god, man! He's one of them Danish gods or something!"

"Oh please!" Duncan scoffed. "He's just a dumb mutie in a dumb outfit." Duncan smirked as he rolled up his sleeve. "I am going to enjoy stomping your mutant butt to the ground. You are going to go down, freak."

"You should listen to your boyfriend, as my friend Kid Razor would say." Thor laughed. "I am the God of the Storm. I command the weather, mortal. Does thou still wish to engage me in combat?" Duncan cocked back his fist.

"Eat human fist, mutie!" Duncan threw the punch, and he hit Thor's jaw. The teenage Thunder God did not even flinch, and Duncan's hand got broken. "**_YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW-WOW-WHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT HURTS!!!!! OH MOMMY, IT HURTS!!!!!! MY HAND!!!!! OWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!"_** Duncan screamed. He leapt up and down, clutching his broken hand.

"Told ya." The player who knew about Thor said.

"Now let me show thee _my_ best punch!" Thor cocked back his fist and nailed Duncan, sending him flying out the mall, screaming like the girl he was. "He is all mouth and no spirit. Shame."

Man, Duncan can never great a break, can he? Anyway, what insanity will happen next? Will Duncan get his butt kicked again? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	3. New Complications!

**A Visit from the Avengers!**

To Red Witch: Glad you're back! I loved the new chapter of "Sleepover Of Doom!" I loved your version of the Scottish Beast! You should do that more often! That was great! Here's more insanity for you! Enjoy! Oh, yeah! Guess what I got at an antique store? I got an old issue of the GI Joe comic! It's #62, the October 1987 issue. In it, Fred VII went to Cobra Island dressed as Cobra Commander. Psyche-Out made his first comic appearance in this issue!

To masked rider beta: I'm glad you liked the story. You want Kelly bashing, huh? Well, I'll see what I can do about that. And I'm glad you liked seeing Duncan get punched in the mouth by Thor. Would you like to see more of Duncan getting beaten by the Avengers?

To Wizard1: When does the new chapter of 'Karaoke Dance Party' come up, man? I want to read it!

Chapter 3: New Complications!

**Xavier Institute**

"Thor's **gone?!**" Jenny exclaimed. She, Clint, Greer, and Razor were conversing in a corner.

"Yeah, he busted out of the infirmary." Clint replied.

"Oh relax, we'll find him." Razor shrugged. "He's a Norse god! He'll stick out like a sore thumb!"

"It's what he _does_ until he's found that we're worried about, Razor." Greer blinked.

"Not to mention he's not completely familiar with modern life yet." Jenny sighed.

"Could be worse. Hercules could be visiting. We all know how well _they_ get along." Clint rolled his eyes.

**Avengers****Mansion****, three days ago**

"Die, knave!"

"Thou suck!" Two teenagers insulted and cursed each other as they brawled. One was Thor. The other was a muscular boy with long curly brown hair and a goatee. He was shirtless except for an orange H-shaped harness on his chest with spikes on it. He also had on brown pants and white boots, and a green belt with a buckle shaped like an orange H. He also carried a golden mace. He was Hercules, the demi-god strongman of Greek myth. Like Thor, he was the son of a god. He was the son of Zeus, the king of the Olympian Gods. And he and Thor did not necessarily get along very well. The other Avengers were watching.

"Isn't anyone going to stop them?" Cap asked.

"Heck no." Clint shook his head. "They'll get tired of it eventually."

"Besides, this looks like something us mortals can never understand." Razor quipped with a chuckle.

"What's to understand? They don't like each other!" Wasp exclaimed.

"Wasp, I have enough problems with a psycho witch after my guitar." Razor groaned as he walked off.

"And I have to go catch up on gossip." Jenny walked away.

"I'll help!" Greer followed.

"I have target practice. Not that I need it or anything." Clint left the room as well.

"Taste Uru metal!" BONK!!

"Kiss my golden mace!" WHAM!!

"Ow, that's gotta hurt!" Ant-Man retched.

**Xavier Institute, Present Time**

"Oh yeah…" Jennifer sighed. "Last time, we barely avoided them painting the walls with each other's blood."

"So, what do we do?" Greer asked.

"Well, if I were a drunken insane Thunder God with a big mouth and matching hammer, where would I go?" Razor thought about it.

"I know!" Tigra grinned.

_This'll be good._ Razor mentally snickered. "No Tigra, The Kid of Rock sincerely doubts that Thor jumped in an anime movie." The werecat shot Razor a raspberry.

"No goofball, remember the last time we went to a mall?"

"Oh yeah, Jenny punched out twelve jocks!" Razor laughed. "Knocked the suckers right into a wall!"

"They thought I was just cheap meat!" Jenny sniffed. "I may have the looks of a Cindy Crawford, but I got Albert Einstein brains too!"

"And the strength of an angry elephant on steroids." Clint added jokingly.

"Anyway, in the mall arcade, Thor became obsessed with the Whack-A-Mole game." Tigra remembered.

"He got banned from it because he used Mjolnir." Clint chuckled.

"So we just have to hope that the Bayville Mall has an arcade." Greer said. "Let's go." The Avengers got ready to leave.

"Oh wait!" Jenny realized. "I have to get home and change! I can't chase him like this!" Jenny motioned to her dress.

"Oh for the love of Motorhead…" Razor groaned, pinching the painted ridge of his nose in annoyance.

"Fine. Meet us there!" Clint said.

"Where are you guys going?" Jean asked.

"We're goin' Thor-hunting, Red." Razor grinned. "BTW, did anyway ever tell you you'd look good in lace? Or wait, leather is more your thing." Razor fired his trademark smirk at her as he walked off. Jean blinked.

_What **was** that guitar-playing goofball talking about?_ Jean blinked. She didn't notice Rogue standing nearby trying to fight off the urge to laugh.

**Jennifer Walters's Room, Avengers Mansion**

Jen materialized in her room. She went to her closet, but then eyed the fact that on her wall were several globs of splattered neon paint.

_I just realized, I never got to pay Kid Razor back for the time he covered my room in paint during the time he and Clint had that paintball war. Maybe I should pay him back now, to show that loudmouth that the She-Hulk has a long memory…_ Jenny put her hand to her mouth and chin in thought as she looked at the globs of paint on her wall. She happened to turn her head to her dresser when she had an evil thought. _Hmm…my address book…of course! Jennifer, you genius!_ She opened up her address book and turned to a listing. She had an evil grin on her face when she saw a particular listing. She put the book down and picked up the phone. _Oh Kid Razor's going to go **nuts** when he finds out what I have planned._

**The Bayville Mall ****Arcade**

A slurring, staggering Thor eyed the arcade.

"Ahhhh…my nemesis of old!" Thor crowed as he recognized the Whack-A-Mole. "This time, you shall fall under the might of Thor, God of Thunder!" The people were eyeing the Norse native nervously. After all, Thor was known to be a little bit on the nuts side when alcohol ruled his brain. "Arise!" He glared at the inactive machine. He forgot that you need a quarter for it. "Arise, foul underground dwellers!" He waited for a couple more minutes, getting angrier every second. "Arise! I command you to rise and get bashed by Mjolnir! ARISE!!!" He waited another minute to get really mad. "Fine! If thou shall not rise under my command, I shall make thee rise!" He raised his hammer and brought it crashing down on the machine, laughing like a madman all the way around.

**On a road to Bayville**

"Hey stop the car!" Razor ordered. Clint stopped his blue car. Razor sat in the back and Greer was in the passenger seat.

"Isn't this the home of that meanie Senator Kelly?" Greer pointed at the house.

"Yup. And that's his car." Razor pointed his guitar at Senator Kelly's car. He plucked it and fired a rainbow Power of Rock beam at the car, causing it to explode! "Correction: **was** his car." Razor laughed as he sat down and hi-fived Clint.

"Alright! Let's go!" Clint drove off with a cackle. **(A/N: Wow. Even the _non_-mutant heroes hate Senator Kelly.)**

**On the roof of a building opposite the Bayville Mall**

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha!" A voice laughed, watching Thor's rampage on the Whack-A-Mole on a window made of mystical energy. It belonged to a blonde girl. She was very beautiful, and she was clad in a green shoulderless costume with yellow zig-zags on it. She also had a green crest on her head. "Oh, my plan to disgrace Thor is working perfectly! And it all started with spiking the Thunder God's soda in the club with that mystical potion that simulates drunkenness! After this, Thor will never be able to show his face in Asgard again!" The Enchantress laughed. "Also, I shall teach Thor that he should _never_ turn me down for a date again!"

Uh oh! Looks like trouble's a-brewin'! Will the Enchantress get her revenge on Thor? What was Jenny's plan for revenge against Razor? Will Jean Grey ever figure out what Kid Razor was talking about? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	4. Mauling and Talking!

**A Visit from the Avengers!**

To Red Witch: Yeah, it's not in the best condition, but it is still readable. And on that same visit in another place, I got an old Avengers comic from 1984, the year I was born! It was a strange one because it guest starred David Letterman. He had some goofy hair in that comic. It made him look like he had a muffin growing out of his head! Oh yeah, I got something special today: I went down to the comic book shop and I got a copy of The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe: Avengers 2004! You should go down to a comic shop and get it! It's full of info! It has entries for over 20 members of the team! I also read the new chapter of "Sleepover of Doom" and I liked it! Warren freed the birds! That was funny! Oh yeah, and the Thor/Hercules brawl was a flashback that happened at the Mansion, not the mall. And did you notice the FF cameo I put in "Hawaiian Havoc"? Here's more madness for you! Enjoy!

Chapter 4: Mauling and Talking!

**Bayville Mall**

"Where in the name of Van Halen is she?" Razor grumbled as he entered the Bayville Mall, Clint and Greer with him. "Jennifer had better be here!"

"Maybe she's in the food court." Clint suggested. Meanwhile, Duncan Matthews was walking around, carrying a small box containing a tuna fish sandwich. He eyed the Avengers walking in clad in their costumes. He particularly paid attention to Tigra.

_Great, now the **Avengers** have got mutants among them. Is no one safe?_ Duncan grumbled. He decided to confront the cat-like Avenger. "Hey mutant!" He said, pointing at Tigra.

"Uh-oh." Clint and Razor said with a groan. Tigra looked around a bit and pointed at herself.

"Me?"

"Yeah you, freak." Duncan marched up to her. "Who do you think you are, marching in here? It's bad enough we gotta see you freaks on the street, now you gotta shop in our malls!"

"Uhm, excuse me Chief Thinks-With-Mouth, Greer here is not a mutant. Technically, she's an altered human." Clint said.

"Shut up, mutant-lover!" Duncan snapped. It started an argument between the archer and football player. Razor crossed his arms and smirked.

_The Kid of Rock should let Clint handle this one. After all, he can take on a jock._ He also noticed the expression on Tigra's face as she eyed the sandwich box Duncan was holding. _Oh, he's got tuna fish. That's the only thing that makes Greer go into 'hunt mode' when not in battle._ Tigra was eyeing Duncan's sandwich hungrily and licking her lips.

_Tuna fish…must have tuna fish…Sweet yummy tuna fish…_Greer saw that Duncan was distracted by his arguing with Clint. She slowly reached for the sandwich, glancing every couple seconds to make sure Duncan was still distracted by the argument with Clint. She neared the sandwich, and her green cat-like eyes gleamed with glee at the thought of being united with the sandwich. It was driving her crazy that there was a tuna fish sandwich in front of her and she wasn't eating it. She laid a hand on the box when…

"Hey!" Duncan hollered. He pulled the box back. "That's **my** sandwich! Back off!" Tigra hissed.

"Mine!" She hissed. "My tuna fish!"

"Bad kitty!" Duncan roared.

_Oh this'll be fun._ Clint snickered. "Hey Lunkhead, just give her the tuna fish and she'll leave you alone."

"No! My tuna fish!" Duncan snapped. Tigra lunged at the football player. "HEY!!! AAAGH!!!"

"Never get between a cat-girl and her tuna fish." Kid Razor chuckled. "Remember that." Razor and Clint watched as Tigra mauled the screaming Duncan.

"WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! HELP ME!!! OWWWWWCHIE!!!!! THAT HURTS!!! WATCH THOSE CLAWS!!!! HELP ME!!! OW OW OW OW OW OWWWW!!!!!!! MAMAAAAAA!!!!!!!!" Duncan screamed.

"C'mon, we gotta meet up with Jen." Clint nudged Razor. "Tigra can handle herself." Razor and Clint left Duncan to be skinned alive by the tuna fish-crazed Tigra.

"**MAMAAAAA!!!!!!**"

**Outside the Bayville Mall**

"Strange…" Amora, the Enchantress, blinked at the magical window. "Only the young members of the Avengers are there. Oh well, I can still deal with the adult Avengers later. And Hawkeye, Kid Razor, Tigra, and the She-Hulk are no threat. It's Thor I desire vengeance against. He shall learn that no man can turn down a date with me!"

**Xavier Institute**

"Have you seen the Avengers?" Dani asked.

"Yeah, they went to the mall." Jean replied. "You know, I envy Jennifer and Greer. No one shoots dirty looks at them when they walk down the street. They can be mistaken for mutants, yet they rarely do!"

"Mm." Dani agreed. "I mean, people blame us for everything, yet they see Jenny with her green skin, no one runs away in fright! No one gets frightened off by Tigra, either!"

"Because they were normal at one point." Roberto said. "Everyone knows about the Avengers. At one point, Jenny Walters and Greer Nelson were normal girls. They never had X-Genes. A blood transfusion turned Walters into the She-Hulk and a lab accident made Greer into Tigra. People don't feel threatened by them because they were changed by something by their own DNA. Anyone could be a mutant. In the case of many of the Avengers, they were in a certain place at a certain time."

"People aren't afraid of the Avengers because their powers were not given to them by their genetic codes. Iron Man _built_ his armor. Without it, he's just a regular person, whoever he is. **(A/N: I know that now in the comics, Iron Man's identity is public knowledge, as well as Daredevil and Captain ****America****.**** However, I decided to make the ID secret since Tony Stark kept it that way originally.)** Captain America got his powers as a result of an experiment. Kid Razor's powers and his big mouth are mystical in nature. Hawkeye has no powers, just arrows with gimmicks and a good aim." Bobby added. "And Ant-Man and Wasp used science! Face it, the only way to get superpowers and be accepted in this world is to either make 'em or get them accidentally."

"Yeah, but I think having the Avengers as allies is a good thing." Dani said. "They don't mind mutants at all. People think they're respectable superheroes because none of them are mutants. If the Avengers don't have problems with mutants, then people may not think so badly of mutants."

"The Avengers have said they are willing to accept mutant members. Just none have stepped up." Jean said. Beast overheard as he passed by.

"To be honest, I have considered accepting their offer of membership myself." Hank grinned.

"Really, Mr. McCoy?" Jean blinked.

"Yeah, it'd be nice to be looked at in a positive light for once." Hank replied with a smile. "It sure would."

Well, looks like things are getting interesting! When will Amora attack? Will Duncan survive Tigra? Will Hank join the Avengers? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	5. Another Mall Brawl!

**A Visit from the Avengers!**

To JojoBlond: Hello! It's nice to hear from you. I'm glad you liked the chapter. It's always nice to hear from new reviewers. You wish to know more about the Avengers, huh? Well, the Marvel website is a good source for information. Another great source I saw floating around was the Unofficial Handbook of the Marvel Universe. That site is currently under renovation, with only the 'A' entries up. If you want to know more about the character of Kid Razor, read and review my Marvel stories "Birth of a Juke Box Hero" and its sequels "Power of Tusk" and "Reptile Trouble". Hope those help.

To Red Witch: I'm glad you liked the Duncan torture. It sucked that you're banned for a little while due to 'Sleepover of Doom'. I can see a tiny bit why they'd think it was an interactive fic, but it still sucks you have a temporary ban. You have the X-Men version of the Marvel Encyclopedia, huh? Well, I'm not surprised. And that thing at the end was a tribute to the fact Hank joined the Avengers for a while. Anyway, enjoy the insanity!

Chapter 5: Another Mall Brawl!

**Bayville Mall**

A crowd had gathered, and they could not believe the sight. Here was this crazy laughing blond kid clad in a costume, carrying a hammer, and wearing a metal helmet with wings on it throwing around Bayville's prized football team like a bunch of ragdolls.

"Ha HA!" Thor crowed as he pitched a linebacker into a pushcart. "Thou disappoint me. Even though thou dost have superior numbers, thou possess poor fighting skills." He threw Duncan, who had the Thunder God in a headlock, off him and onto a banister. Duncan landed in a straddle.

"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Duncan screeched like a banshee. He fell over the rail, with a blue face. "Oh mommy, I'm hurting…Somebody call the doctor…"

"Thou may be large, but thou still fight most foully!" Thor sneered at a huge tackle, sending him through a wall. "I am the greatest!"

"Aren't you going to stop this?" A voice asked.

"Nah." Another voice replied. "This is way too entertaining." The source was across the way, at the Food Court. Sitting there was the She-Hulk having a soda, clad in a blue t-shirt and jeans. With her was Jubilation Lee, Jenny's regular partner-in-shopping.

"Why did you want me to come, Jen? We found Thor." Jubilee blinked.

"Basically I wanted to get Razor back for paintballing my room." Jen grinned.

"That was long ago!"

"I know. I wanted Razor to know that the She-Hulk has a long memory." Jen smirked evilly. Clint and Greer ran up to the two, Greer happily munching on a tuna fish sandwich.

"Hey guys." The girls grinned.

"Where's my hunky rockstar?" Jubilee grinned.

"He's right…Huh?" Clint turned around and saw Razor was gone. "Huh? Now where'd Kid Razor go to?"

**Outside the Bayville Mall**

Razor sat on a bench outside the mall.

"I ain't going back in there. No way no how not ever! At least, not until Jubilee is gone or at least 50 miles away from me! I wish her parents would let her rejoin the X-Men, so the Kid of Rock would have a constant clue as to where she is so he can stay away from her, her insanity, and the absolute worst, her Groupie Hug of Death." Kid Razor grumbled. He looked up and noticed someone on the roof of the building opposite the wall. "Hello…" Razor smirked. "Well, well, well. Looks like the Kid of Rock's night is getting better after all." He looked up at the figure. Her green-and-yellow costume stood out like a nightlight against the night sky. "Oh good, the Enchantress. An evil sorceress the Kid of Rock actually _likes_. I wonder if she's in the mood to party. With a name like Amora, she must _love_ to party." Kid Razor powered up and flew to the building.

**Back inside the mall**

"Why does Razor always play hard to get like this?" Jubilee sighed. "I'm so depressed. I need an ice cream sundae."

_No wonder Kid Razor avoids her like the plague. I feel real sorry for you, Parkins. Having this loony chase after you like a dog after a fire hydrant in the back of a truck._ Clint chuckled at his own joke. _Darn it, dude. When will you get the heck off your crazy arse and tell her who you really are. If you're lucky, she just might decide she never wants anything to do with you again. After all, she loves Kid Razor, not Bobby Parkins. I don't understand why he does this, keeping his identity secret from her. I don't get it at all._ "Maybe you come on a little strongly?" Clint groaned, rolling his eyes.

"I think it's funny." Tigra giggled. "And Thor just ran out to the parking garage." She pointed at the Thunder God. He was flying just above the ground into the garage.

"Uh-oh." The four super-powered teens said at the same time. They followed the Norse warrior to the Parking Garage.

"Oh, Cap's going to kill us." Greer gulped.

"Thanks a lot, Thor." Jenny grumbled, crossing her arms.

"Now what do we do?" Clint gulped.

"Maybe we should tell Captain America that a supervillain attacked." Jubilee suggested. "That's a good excuse." The three Avengers and former X-Man watched Thor go on a rampage. He was attacking the cars that were parked there.

"You foul Metal Demons thought thou could stop me, the God of Thunder? Thou are gravely mistaken!" Thor smashed a Dodge with Mjolnir. Suddenly, a crashing sound was heard.

"**_WHOA AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!_**" Kid "Rock 'n' Roll" screamed as he crashed into the ground. "Oh that's going to leave a whole **BUNCH** of marks!"

"_RAZOR!!!_" The sober kids ran and helped Razor up.

"Baby, you alright?" Jubilee asked.

"Razor, you alright?!" Jen asked.

"What happened, Razor?" Clint wondered.

"Are you with us right now?" Greer blinked.

"Ugh." Razor grumbled, shaking his head. "Never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever _ever EVER_ try to hit on Amora." Razor growled.

**The building opposite the Bayville Mall, a few minutes earlier**

"Well, well, well. The Enchantress." Amora heard Kid Razor's voice. She looked up and saw the fearless super-rocker hovering in front of her. "What is your fantastic-looking self doing up here tonight? Seeing if you can get yourself some of me?"

"Begone, Kid Razor. I am in no mood for you or your flirting. I am seeking vengeance on that fool Thor. I shall make him **pay** for turning me down for a date."

"Oh, the vengeful type." Razor rolled his eyes. Amora sneered. "Yeah, I know the type: 'If I don't get my way, you shall pay'." Razor mocked, making the 'talky-talky' motion with his hand. Amora saw red.

"HOW **DARE** YOU INSULT ME LIKE THAT!!!!" She roared. She blasted the Ultimate Rock Star with a magical blast that sent Razor flying back to the mall.

"You're cute when you're mad!" Razor cat-called as he flew off. Amora growled.

Well, looks like things are heating up! What insanity will happen next? Will the Avengers be able to beat Amora? Will Thor sober up? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	6. Looking for Thor and Random Madness!

**A Visit from the Avengers!**

_To Guitar Wolf: Hello! It's nice to hear from you! I'm glad to be on your favorites list. Which story did Jean go to a brothel in? Gee, I don't remember. It was in one of Red Witch's 100-chapter fics, perhaps "The Misfit Chronicles". It was one that was published a while back. I tried to use that e-mail address, but it could deliver it._

_To Red Witch: I'm glad you love this chapter, Red Witch. Sorry for the late update. Lack of ideas, and all that. Yeah, I'll keep Thor drunk. Thor's gonna stagger around and…hey! Thor! Put down that mannequin! You aren't Fred Astaire, man! THOR!!! Anyway, enjoy the new chapter, RW! Free Red Witch! _

_To Raliena: Hey Rae! Glad you liked the chapter! Sorry about the late update! Hope you like this new one!_

_To Sparky Genocide: J. Jonah Jameson trying to make the X-Men and Avengers look like menaces? Well, I think Jameson has a lot of respect for Captain __America__. However, I can imagine him questioning Cap's decision to lead a team of super-powered teenagers. I do like your ideas of Kid Razor and Thor paying JJ a "visit" at the Daily Bugle office, as well as Beast getting drunk and becoming Perry White. That is funny! Enjoy the late new chapter!_

**Author's Note: Hey there, faithful readers! L1701E here! Listen, I'm sorry I took so long to update this story. You see, I was running out of ideas for this one and I was coming up with new ideas for new stories. Also, being a college student, I always don't have a lot of time to update or work on any of my stories, because I have to study and all. Anyway, I thank you all for being patient, and I hope this new chapter is well worth the wait! Thanks again!**

**Disclaimer: "You think I'm some kind of dumb cop?" - Christopher Meloni as Det. Eliot Stabler, Law and Order: SVU (A show that both me and my sister like).**

Chapter 6: Looking for Thor and Random Madness!

**The Bayville Mall parking lot**

"Kid Razor, you _seriously_ need to learn to keep your big mouth shut YEOW!!!" The She-Hulk screamed as she dodged a magical blast from an angry Amora.

"Oh go trash a city!" Razor grumbled, firing a Power of Rock beam at the teenaged Asgardian sorceress.

"Fools! Show me where Thor is, and I may let you live!" Amora snapped, creating a forcefield around her that blocked the rainbow-colored beam.

"What is her problem?!" Jubilee exclaimed as she fired her fireworks at Amora.

"She ain't really evil. She's just one of those high-maintenance women." Clint grumbled in his Hawkeye costume as he loaded two explosive arrows on his bow and fired them.

"Yeah, a spoiled blonde brat who happens to be a near-immortal sorceress." Jubilee laughed in agreement. Amora grumbled.

"Why must you mortals be so _annoying?!_"

"_Us?__ He**llo!** You're_ the one trying to blow away our friend Thor!" Jenny exclaimed. Razor noticed something.

"Um, Jenny…" Razor tapped her shoulder.

"Not now, Razor. And another thing…"

"Jenny…"

"Not now, Razor."

"_Jenny!_"

"_Not now!_"

"_JENNY!!_"

"**_WHAT?!_**" Jenny Walters exclaimed in Razor's face, making him stumble backwards a bit.

"Thor's gone. Tigra too."

"**_WHAT?!?!?!?!?!_**" Everyone yelled.

"Oh, by Odin's teeth, thou _must_ be jesting! **Please** reveal to me that thou art jesting!" Amora groaned.

"Does the Kid of Rock look like he's joking, you Pam Anderson-wannabe?!" Razor snapped.

**Outside the mall**

" Thor…_Thor…Thoooooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…_" Tigra called as she walked around the mall, cupping her mouth with her hands. "Here Thunder God…Heeeeere Thunder God…Here Thunder God Thunder God Thunder God Thunder God…Heeeeeeeeere Thunder God…" She grabbed a passing businessman. "Excuse me, have you seen a teenage boy? He's about yay tall, very muscled, long blond hair, wears a silver helmet with wings on it, carries a hammer, and is drunk?"

"I have no clue! Now get the $&# away from me, freak!" The businessman snapped as he walked off.

"I'm an Avenger, jerk!" Tigra yelled at him. "I know people who can make you disappear!"

"Yeah right!" The businessman laughed. "HEY!" Suddenly, two SHIELD agents appeared out of nowhere and dragged him into the bushes.

**Above Bayville**

"_Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa__, God of Thunder, God of Thunder/ Smashing things, smashing things/ My drink was just spiked, My drink was just spiked/ Loki sucks, Loki sucks!_" Thor sang as he flew over Bayville. His flight path was rather wobbly. "Man, I am bored." He eyed an arcade. "Ah! Game machines! They provide amusement!" He crash-landed in front of the arcade, causing some passers-by to run away screaming. "Oh, my head…" He picked up his helmet. "Awwww…a wing's broken!" He teared up. "My helmet…Thou have served me well. We have charged into great battles together." A teary-eyed Thor punched a hole in the sidewalk with his fist, then put his helmet in the hole.

**Nearby the mall**

"_Oh what a night/Late December back in '63…_" Senator Kelly sang out as he drove down the street. Suddenly, his car hit a nail on the road, and his tire exploded. He screamed as his car swerved, and he ended up smashing into the back of a manure truck. Manure poured all over him from the back. "Oh **_YECH!!!!!!_** MANURE!!! I **HATE** MANURE!!! THOSE STUPID MUTANTS!!!"

**Bayville Mall ****Arcade**

"THOR!!!" Amora roared as she marched into an arcade. An employee tried to stop her. "Out of my way, mortal!" She grabbed him and threw him over her head, using the great strength all Asgardians had. "Thor, get your hammer-wielding butt out here now! Thor!"

**The ****Food Court**

"The Kid of Rock cannot believe we're actually _joining forces_ with the Enchantress. I hate evil chick sorcerers!" Razor grumbled as he peeked under a table. "No Thor."

"Razor, the Enchantress isn't really evil. She's a super-powered spoiled brat!" Jenny said, holding up a picture of Thor and asking around. Clint and Jubilee were doing the same. Razor eyed Duncan Matthews walk by, and his face formed an evil grin.

**The Xavier Institute**

"Do you think the Avengers are alright?" Jean asked Hank.

"They're kids, but they can take care of themselves. They've fought crazy villains, like Italian crimelords, crazed robots, and even time-travelling fiends." Hank chuckled.

"And you want to _join_ them?" Scott blinked.

"Someday." Hank grinned.

_Five gets you ten that Hank just wants to join the Avengers as an excuse to spend nights getting drunk with __Iron__Man._ Jean said to Scott telepathically.

_I would not be surprised._ Scott replied. "AGH!!!" He got hit in the back of the head with a chair. "WHO THREW THAT?!"

"So Kitty, how was it in Chicago with Jake?" Dani asked Kitty. "What was up with the vigilantes?"

"Like, it was great!" Kitty smiled. "We met this bunch of mutants called the Southside Misfits. They're like a Misfit tribute group or something." She told her friend about all the members.

"A girl who likes _Pyro_?" Dani blinked. "I mean, don't get me wrong. St. John's a nice guy, he's just…well…nuts. He thinks Sally Struthers is out to rule the world."

"She's a little mis-wired as well." Kitty added, twirling her finger around her head in the 'crazy' gesture.

"A leader who can gain any power needed to get out of a situation, a girl raised in a music store with powers from both Wanda and Kid Razor, a jokester who can find anything and anyone, a big strong guy with a bad temper, a pyromaniac with a Pyro-obsession, a techno-geek with electric powers, and a female Starr." Dani shook her head with a smile. "Incredible."

Well, looks like the hunt for Thor has begun! What insanity will happen next? Will the Avengers and Amora find him? Where will he go next? What'll Razor do to Duncan? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	7. Watching a Battle!

**A Visit From the Avengers!**

_To Raliena: Well, like Red Witch, my Misfit-verse occurs in a continuity. However, unlike the real X-Men comics, actually Marvel comics in general, I'll try not to let continuity get screwed up. Hope you like the new chapter! _

_To Sparky Genocide: Yeah, I can imagine Thor going out with the Enchantress once and then wanting out because she becomes crazy-obsessive-possessive-manic-depressive whatever. I think you nailed it perfectly, Sparky. You can't help but respect Captain __America__ if you live in the Marvel Universe, whether you like or dislike costumed heroes. I can imagine Jameson not liking Cap for being a costumed hero, but also respecting the ideals he fights for. Did you know that in one issue of Amazing Spider-Man, JJ actually confessed that he was jealous of Spider-Man? He did! Could you imagine the fun Spidey would have if he had learned that? Yeah, if Kid Razor found out JJ was talking smack about him, Razor would travel to __New York__ and smack him in the face. As Kid Razor would say, just because he's a costumed superhero, doesn't mean he can't say or show people his own opinions. _

_To Red Witch: Hey Red Witch. I'm glad you're back! I read the new chapters of "This Soap Opera Called Life", and I absolutely loved the Dr. Doom appearance. You know what, RW? I can imagine Kid Razor or Thunderbolt run their mouths in Dr. Doom's masked face. Oh, imagine the destruction! I'm glad you liked what I did to Kelly. I hope you like this new chapter! _

_To Aaron: I'm glad you liked the chapter! I thought Kid Razor would compare Amora to Pam Anderson. They are both blondes, anyway. Well, I can imagine a teenage Enchantress being more of a spoiled brat than evil. I'm glad you liked the scene where Thor buried his helmet. It was worth a laugh. I'm glad you liked the little talk between Kitty and Danielle about the Southside Misfits. Dude, you should write your fic! It sounds great! Just write the first chapter, and I'll beta-read and fix it up for you. For Scott, you should have him freak out at their name. I mean, completely lose it! So would the older X-Men. Althea, Fred, Pietro, Lance, Wanda and Todd would be happy to meet more Misfits. John would just keep on setting fires. I think the New Mutants would be rather curious about them. Hope those help out. Enjoy the new chapter!_

**Disclaimer: "Nice Pants, the smell of corduroy." - Colin Mockerey, Whose Line is it Anyway?**

Chapter 7: Watching a Battle!

**The Xavier Institute, Jamie's office/room**

"Uh huh. Uh huh. Yeah, I see. Okay, I'll talk to you later. And stay away from that guy. The only thing that may be trustworthy about him is his hair, and I don't want to test that theory." Jamie Madrox, manager extraordinaire, was in his office, doing what he did best: Getting his clients gigs. He looked at a script on his desk, and made another call. "Hello? I saw the script. Yeah, I have to get it to Lila. Well, what do you expect? She's a _huge_ rock star! She's busy recording! Look, if she has any free time, I'll get her the script! Yeah. Thanks. Buh bye." Jamie looked at a random page. "I definitely can't imagine Lila doing that. She's as big a klepto as Tabby. Speaking of which, I know one of them stole my little dinosaur model again. What they want with it is beyond me. I can understand Trinity stealing it for some freaky experiment that most likely breaks every law man and God ever put down, but _Lila_ or _Tabby?_ I don't get it. I just don't get it." Jamie blinked. "Aw great, now I'm talking to myself." A knock was heard at his door. "Yo!" Jean looked in.

"Hey Jamie." Jean smiled.

"What's up?"

"The Avengers are on TV." Jean said. "They're going at it with some girl called the Enchantress." Jamie's eyes widened.

"Holy Toledo!" Jamie rushed out and ran to the TV. The X-Men were gathered around the TV, watching the news. The footage was live from Bayville's town square, and the Avengers were fighting for their lives. Amora flew in the sky, firing magical blasts, surrounded by a purple energy bubble. Kid Razor flew around her, blasting at the bubble with energy beams. The She-Hulk was swatting at her with a lamppost. Hawkeye was firing his arrows and Jubilee was blasting fireworks.

"Is that…_Jubilee?_" Tabby said in shock.

"I thought the Avengers _had_ no mutant members!" Kitty said.

"Jubilee didn't join." Jamie said. Everyone turned to him. "She and the She-Hulk are friends. Jubilee helped Kid Razor and Jenny take on the Abomination in Cleveland. Jenny wants to bring Jubes into the Avengers. However, Razor said if that happens, he'll quit."

"Well, I think Jubilee will make a wonderful Avenger, then. Especially if it drives that loudmouth rocker away from here." Scott grinned. Jamie smacked him upside the head. "Hey!"

"Kid Razor's big mouth equals big bucks, Scott!" Jamie exclaimed. "Wait a minute! Sonic Blue!"

"Sonic Blue?" Amara blinked. "Who is he?"

"Sonic Blue's this mega-genius kid from Cincinnati. He made this armor that grants him superhuman speed and the ability to fire sonic blasts, like Banshee and Siryn!"

"What does this Sonic Blue guy have to do with it?" Jean asked.

"Kid Razor and Sonic Blue are a regular superhero tag-team. In fact, they're known as the Ohio Connection. He's Razor's best friend. Sonic Blue's always been able to keep Jubilee's jets cooled and Razor's temper from going out of control."

"You manage rockers and now you play counselor too?" Bobby quipped.

"Well, I was thinking that if Sonic Blue joined the Avengers, and he's been wanting to himself, maybe it would convince Razor to stick around. After all, Avengers merchandise with Kid Razor are very hot sellers. People _rip each other apart_ for that stuff!" Jamie smiled. **(A/N: This is a little preview for another Evo Avengers story I plan to do)**

"What I'd like to know is where are the adult Avengers? Not to mention Thor and Tigra." Storm wondered.

"As long as Tigra is nowhere near me, I'm not going to complain." Logan grumbled. _If she comes after me, screaming 'puppy' again, I will give her a free lobotomy!_ Jean accidentally overheard the thought.

"Mr. Logan!" Jean exclaimed in shock.

"What?" Logan blinked.

**In Bayville**

"HELP ME!!!" Duncan Matthews screamed as he unknowingly ran to the battle. Thor was chasing after him.

"Come back and get beaten, knave!" Thor roared. Tigra chased after the two.

"Thor, get back here! Thor-chan! Oh, Wasp-chan is going to be _so_ mad when she finds out about this!"

I think Tigra may have a point! What insanity will happen next? What caused the Enchantress and the Avengers to break out into another fight? Will the X-Men help? What'll the adult Avengers think? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	8. Brawls and Broads!

**A Visit From the Avengers!**

_To Red Witch: Hey Red Witch! I read the new chapters of "This Soap Opera Called Life" and I loved them! I want more! Yeah, it's so much fun writing __Duncan__ torture. I hope you like this new chapter! _

_To Sparky Genocide: That was just what I thought. You know what? JJ doesn't really deserve Bubba. Besides, Kid Razor would probably just glue a rainbow afor wig on his head and leave him hanging from a flagpole by his boxers. J. Jonah Jameson is a jerk, but he's a jerk to everybody equally. And according to the comics, he has written editorials supporting civil rights and showing disdain for organized crime. He only hates Spider-Man because he envies him and he has issues with masked men because his first wife died at the hands of masked men. I hope you like this new chapter!_

_To Proponent of EVO: Hello! Nice to hear from you! I hope you read and review my other work on this site. I'm glad you like my portrayal of the Avengers. I chose the members for various reasons: Cap was a must. So were Iron Man, Thor, Wasp, and the Henry Pym Ant-Man. Those four were four of the original Avengers roster! Hawkeye is a favorite of Avenger fans like myself, and in my opinion no Avenger team is complete without Hawkeye. I added the She-Hulk and Tigra because the team could use a couple girls. Kid Razor is a superhero I created, and I brought him into the Avengers because every hero team needs the resident rebellious loudmouth. You can see the Evo version of Jubilee being that creepy. I intended Jubilee as a bit of a sidekick/semi-groupie. The crush Jubilee has on Kid Razor is simple: Kid Razor is a super-powered rocker, and chicks dig rockers. I hope you enjoy this new chapter!_

_To Raliena: Hey Rae! Glad you liked the last chapter! Yeah, Jamie is branching out. He's a guy who can create clones of himself. Which means he has no trouble doing more than one thing at once (And when he gets a little older, more than one date at once, heh heh). I'm sure that Jamie has met his clients face-to-face. They probably agreed to have him manage because of the whole "Aw-look-he's-so-cute-pretending-to-be-a-Hollywood-powerhouse" thing. Hope you like the new chapter!_

**Disclaimer: "I am a sexy beast, baby!" - Chris Jericho**

Chapter 8: Brawls and Broads

**Downtown Bayville**

"Call me a trollop, will you?!" The Enchantress howled at Kid Razor. She threw a ball of magic at the super-rocker.

"Ha! The Kid of Rock has something to counter that!" Razor swung his guitar and knocked the blast away like a baseball. "And it's a long line drive! The Indians take the freakin' Pennant!"

_What is this insane mortal talking about?!_ Amora mentally wondered. "Hey!" Amora saw a streetlamp whiz by her, like a javelin. The blonde sorceress glared at the She-Hulk on the ground.

"You are a royal _pain_, Blondie!"

"After I am through with the loudmouth, you are next, green wench!' She felt something land on her energy bubble from the top. "What?" Amora looked up and saw a stupidly-grinning Thor laying on top of the bubble on his stomach, grinning at her. "Thor!"

"At last! I have found thee, King of Whack-a-Moles!" Thor crowed, raising his hammer.

"No, you drunken fool!" Amora screamed. An insanely laughing Thor started pounding on the bubble. "Thor! Stop!"

"Die, foul royal!" Thor kept smacking.

"Does it bother anyone here that one of our big powerhouses is a Asgardian nut with a magic hammer?" Clint blinked.

"So? We also have a Cleveland loudmouth with a magic guitar." Tigra grinned, pointing at Razor.

"You see Jubes? _That_ is your destiny if you join us: Watching Thor smash things like the big loon he is." Razor grumbled.

"So?" Jubilee shrugged. "Keep in mind, you also work with an armored drunk who moonlights as a rampaging Scotsman."

"True." Razor nodded. His superhuman hearing picked up a jet flying. "Well Jubey, looks like your old buddies have arrived."

"Oh look, the X-Men." Clint snickered as the X-Jet hovered down.

"Thor! Stop that and get down!" Amora screamed.

"It's _your_ fault he's doing that! _You're_ the one who put him under that drunk spell!" Jenny snapped.

"WHY WON'T YOU DIE, FOUL CREATURE?!" Thor screamed as he continued pounding at the bubble. Cyclops, Shadowcat, Storm, Jean, Wolverine, and Angel ran/flew out of the jet.

"Well, well, well. I see Cyclops is back from the looney bin." Kid Razor grinned. A scowling Scott walked up to Razor.

"Oh look, Kid Razor being the typical pretty boy." Scott scowled. Razor smirked.

"What's the matter, Summers? Can't handle the jealousy you feel right now because you know that you are standing in the presence of greatness?" Razor grinned.

"Oh yeah, and thanks for the makeover on my car!" Scott snapped.

"What did you do to his car?" Jubilee asked Razor. Razor shot Jubilee a playful grin.

"I fixed it."

"Yeah, he fixed it alright! He put my beautiful Mustang to sleep!" Scott yelled.

"I guess you don't need our help after all." Warren blinked.

"No, but you guys are perfectly welcome to stay for the clean-up and after-party." Razor laughed.

"Hey!" Amora shouted. Thor shattered the energy bubble and Amora screamed as she fell and hit the ground hard. She got to her feet, moaning. A smirking Clint pulled an arrow out of the quiver on his back. He loaded it on his bow and pointed it at Amora.

"Hey girl! Hope you enjoy my knockout gas arrow." Clint fired the arrow. Amora growled and waved her hand. The arrow flew away, completely off course.

"Uh oh…" Clint blinked. The arrow flew into the X-Jet and…the jet exploded. "Oops."

"Nice aim, Clint." Tigra blinked. The X-Men's jaws dropped.

"Oops?" Scott said in disbelief. "Oops?" He turned his head to Clint. "_Oops?!_ You blew up our plane, and all you can say is **_OOPS?!_**"

"Hoo boy, Scott's about to crack." Razor snickered.

"I think he already did a little bit." Jubilee noted.

"How are we going to explain this to Chuck?" Logan wondered.

"Now how the heck did **that** happen?!" Warren blinked.

"You mortals are real pains, thou know that?!" Amora growled.

"My head hurts."

"Shut up, Thor." Amora ordered.

"That's it!" Jenny rushed Amora and started punching her.

"Get off me at once, green wench!" Amora hissed.

"Make me, you over-powered blonde bimbo!" Jenny hissed back.

"CATFIGHT!!!" Razor called. "HEY EVERYBODY!!! SUPER-CHICK CATFIGHT!!!"

"Razor, put that camera away!" Kitty snapped.

"You want me to put the camera down?! Come here and _make_ the Kid of Rock!" Razor challenged.

Well, well, well! Looks like the insanity keeps rolling along! What insanity will happen next? How will the X-Men get home? What'll Clint do now? Will Scott snap? Will Thor sober up? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	9. Coming Back!

**A Visit from the Avengers!**

_To Raliena: Hey Rae! I'm glad you liked the last chapter! Enjoy this new one!_

_To Sparky Genocide: Yeah, and I can imagine that Jameson would not mind mutants, but he doesn't like mutants that decide to use their powers to play vigilante. JJ hates Ben Ulrich, huh? Well, did you know his nephew Phil was a heroic version of the Green Goblin for a while? It…was weird. Very weird. Very, very, weird. Very, very, very weird. Ben Ulrich knew Daredevil's secret identity, huh? Cool. I think he's a public hero now. I think everyone knows Matt Murdock is Daredevil now. I'm not sure. I like your suggestion, but I think the cops would rather arrest the X-Men, considering the fact that they're considered outlaws, and the Avengers are considered legit because the government played a part in forming them. I hope you like the new chapter! _

_To Red Witch: Yeah, another jet has bitten the dust! Anyway, I've been keeping up with "This Soap Opera Called Life" and I loved the chapters! Can't wait for more!_

**Disclaimer: "I got the Cat Scratch Fever." - Ted Nugent, Cat Scratch Fever**

Chapter 9: Coming Back!

**Downtown Bayville**

"This is so awesome." Kid Razor grinned. He and Clint Barton, aka Hawkeye, were decked out on lawn chairs, bowls of popcorn on their laps, and cold drinks in the arms. They were watching Amora and the She-Hulk catfight.

"Asgardian witch!"

"Midgardian brat!"

"Cow!"

"Serpent!"

"Old Bag!"

"Foul demon!"

"Oh yeah." Clint grinned in agreement, high-fiving Razor.

"You two are complete perverts, you know that?" Jubilee put her hands on her hips as she scolded the two heroes.

"Hey, I deserve this." Clint smirked. "After all the times that green gal has thrown me around and used me like a punching bag, I deserve to ogle at the She-Hulk in a catfight."

"Maybe she wouldn't lay the smackdown on you so much if you would stop throwing her those dumb pick-up lines." Jubilee said.

"Hey, those pick-up lines work!"

"Yeah, they work like a dead battery." Razor quipped.

"Oh, shut up." Clint pouted. Meanwhile, Scott was standing in front of the flaming wreckage of the X-Jet, which exploded after Amora caused an arrow of Clint's to hit the X-Jet in just the right spot. He fell to his knees.

"The jet…" Scott squeaked. "The jet…The jet…The jet…The jet…" Warren walked up next to Scott.

"Uhm, Scott…It was an accident. Clint was clearly aiming for Amora." Warren tried to reassure.

"The jet…"

"She _does_ have magic powers…"

"The jet…"

"She _can_ screw up the path of his arrows, man."

"The jet…"

"Clint's a bit of a letch, but he's a real good archer. He hits what he aims at. It was Amora's fault. She screwed up the path of Clint's arrow."

"The jet…"

"Uhm…He's gone. The man's gone." Warren sighed. He left Scott to wallow in his own trauma.

"I hope you're filming this, Barton." Razor grinned, watching the superheroine catfight.

"On it." Clint produced a camera.

"Can someone help me?" Tigra called. She was trying to lift a snoozing Thor.

"Zzzzzzzzz…die, Frost Giants…zzzzzzz…ooh Sif, thou art cheeky, huh huh huh…" Thor mumbled sleepily. "Zzzzzzzz…That's some nice outfit, Amora…zzzzzzzzz…"

"Oh, brother." Tigra rolled her eyes. "Thor, you wing-helmeted dope, wake up!"

"Are you _really_ sure you want to join the Avengers?" Razor asked Jubilee. The Asian mutant grinned.

"Heck yeah!"

"Hey, somebody help me!" Tigra exclaimed. "Thor, where's your helmet?!"

"Zzzzzz…TV…We all on TV…zzzzzz…"

"Oh forget it!" Tigra groaned.

"Hang on, Tigra. I got him." Jean used her telekinetic powers to raise Thor up. "I'll get him back to the mansion and get my car to get you guys back home." Jean flew off, Thor in tow.

"Ale! More ale!" Thor sleep-screamed.

"Shut up, Thor." Jean grumbled.

"Now what do we do about them?" Warren asked Storm and Logan, pointing at a brawling She-Hulk and Amora with his thumb.

"I say let 'em finish." Logan rolled his eyes. "Like heck if I'm breaking _that_ up. I value my health."

"Good point." Warren noted.

"Oh you two…" Storm rolled her eyes. She walked up to the catfight, and called upon a lightning bolt. The bolt knocked the two super-powered girls apart. They both had marks on them that indicated they went through a scuffle.

"Hey!" They both exclaimed. They both glared at each other.

"Watch it, Storm!" Clint yelled. "You nearly broke my camera!"

**The Xavier Institute, a few minutes later**

"Man, what a great night! I got to lay some good shots on Amora!" Jenny grinned. She stated throwing her fists in the air in exaggerated punching motions. "Pow! Pow! Wham!"

"AGH!!" Scott ended up fling through the door, thanks to Jenny accidentally nailing him with her punches.

"Oops. Sorry." Jenny winced. "I really have got to watch that."

"No no no no _NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!_" Kitty and Greer screamed at the TV. They were watching a Bears game.

"Like, I can't _believe_ it!" Kitty groaned.

"If only we could have the '85 lineup back." Greer sighed. "I tell you, you put "The Fridge" on defense, you're basically putting the Great Wall of China on the field."

"No kidding." Kitty agreed. "What happened to the Bears?"

"1986 happened, that's what." Greer joked. The two Chicago girls burst out laughing.

"Oh yeah." Kitty laughed. "Have you ever seen that totally silly song the '85 Bears did?"

"Oh yeah, I heard it." Greer laughed. "My Dad and Mom told me back in the day, you couldn't walk down the street in Chicago without hearing the Super Bowl Shuffle." She started singing. "_We're not here, to start no trouble/We're just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle!_" Kitty laughed at that.

"That song is so dumb." Kitty laughed. "Good thing they won the Super Bowl that year, or else they'd look really stupid."

"Thank goodness." Greer agreed.

"What're you girls yappin' about?" Jenny asked.

"The Chicago Bears." Kitty and Greer replied together. Jenny laughed.

"The Bears. More like the Teddy Bears." Jenny smirked. "Me? I'm a Raider girl…when they're in LA."

"At least the Browns stayed in one city." Razor chuckled as he walked by.

"What're you up to now, Razor?" Jenny wondered.

"The Kid of Rock says he grew bored with watching Scott trying to chew out Clint. Entertaining, but eventually grew stale. He's going to go find some amusement…" Razor smirked as he walked off, pulling out his wallet and counting the money inside.

Well, looks like things have finally calmed down…or have they? What insanity will happen next? What's Razor up to? Will Greer sing the Super Bowl Shuffle some more? Will Scott be able to chew out Clint? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!


	10. Finally, It's Over!

**A Visit From the Avengers!**

_To Sparky Genocide: JJ kind of reminds me of Sgt. Polanski from my Marvel Kid Razor fics. I can imagine that people did suspect Matt Murdock of being Daredevil. I just got the Handbook of the Marvel Universe: Daredevil 2004 edition. I have them all so far except for Spider-Man. I'll have to recheck it to see for sure. I doubt the cops would appreciate super-heroes causing major damage. I'll have some more Scott torture for you. Enjoy the new chapter!_

_To Firefly25: Hey there, man! Got the new e-mail! I can't wait to read the completed second chapter! I'm sure it would not be too long before Xavier recommends that Scott have a nice long talk with Psyche-Out. I would not be surprised either if Razor and Clint have many more catfight videos **(Clint: Yeah! Our favorites are the catfight between Tigra and Typhoid Mary, and the one between the She-Hulk and Titania! Want to see them?)** I would not be surprised if they tried to make them into a television show. I'm glad you liked the last chapter and I hope you like the new chapter!_

_To Dare Moondance: Hello! Nice to hear from you! I heard I was on your Favorite Authors list! I hope you enjoy all my stories! I hope you like this new chapter, and thanks for the info about the Browns. Hope to hear more from you._

_To Red Witch: Hey there, Red Witch! Nice to hear from you again! I've read the new chapter of "This Soap Opera Called Life" and I loved it. I feel very bad for Evan's parents, Red. You remember the Super Bowl Shuffle, huh? Wow. You've been around. I live in __New York__ and once lived in __Boston__, so the Patriots are really big in my book. I still have some old t-shirts! I'm glad you liked the last chapter, and I hope you like this new one full of madness!_

**Disclaimer: "Assimilate this." - Michael Dorn as Lt. Comm. Worf, Star Trek: First Contact**

Chapter 10: Finally, It's Over!

**The Xavier Institute**

"What a night…" Greer sighed. "Thank goodness it's over at last."

"Thor is resting in the infirmary again, which Colossus and Magma repaired." Beast said.

"Don't worry about it, Hank. We won't inconvenience you." Tigra bowed respectfully. "We'll take Thor with us when we get back home."

_He'll sing the whole way, but I can just beat him with a stick._ Jenny thought as she overheard from her position on a couch, with a phone. She looked at Scott, who sat quiet and still in an armchair, looking traumatized.

"The jet…" Scott squeaked. "My car…the jet…my car…the jet…my car…the jet…my car…the jet…my car…"

"Oh relax. It was an accident." Jenny said to Scott. "It was Amora's fault. She should've let Clint's arrow hit her. It's only neighborly." The She-Hulk joked. "_Yooooooo-hoooooooooo__ ollie ollie oxen free…_" Jenny sang, snapping her fingers in front of Scott's face. "Forget it. That boy's gone. Gone like the wind." Meanwhile, Jean Grey was busy writing in her journal.

"And finally…" She mumbled to herself. She heard a knock. "Come in." She looked up as she closed her book. Her face turned deadpan. "Oh. It's you, Kid Razor. What's up?"

**In the Common Room, a few minutes later**

"I wonder where Razor went off to." Danielle asked Roberto.

"Who cares?" Roberto shrugged. "That bigmouthed rocker thinks he's the greatest thing since sliced cheese or something. As far as I think that anyone is concerned, he probably is out parading somewhere."

"KID 'ROCK 'N' ROLL' RAZOR, YOU DISGUSTING PERVERT!!!!" Jean stormed into the Common Room, a laughing Razor walking after her. "How **_dare_** you insinuate that about me!"

"Oh, give the Kid of Rock a break!" Razor huffed. "We all know about the stuff you and Glasses over there get into on a regular basis! Heck, a _tape_ was sent to the Avengers Mansion!" Razor laughed. Jean blanched.

"**_WHO DID IT?!?!?!?!_**" Jean screamed. Someone peeked into the room through the hall.

"Uh oh…" Jamie Madrox said to himself as he sneaked away. "Althea had better pay me quick or I'm a dead man."

"Oh relax, Jean! The Kid of Rock has twenty bucks. He would've paid you." Razor waved a twenty. That snapped Scott out of his revelry.

"What happened?" Scott wondered.

"Scott…did Jean go to a brothel?" Dani asked with a snicker. The students and Avengers burst out laughing.

"Yeah, the Dreadnoks sold Jean…after…the Pulsar…WAIT A MINUTE!!!!" Scott turned and saw Razor wave a twenty at Jean. He didn't need to be a rocket scientist to figure out what was going on.

"_THAT'S **IT!!!!** KID RAZOR, YOU ARE **DEAD!!!!!**_" Scott pulled down his glasses, firing an optic blast at the Ultimate Rockstar. Unfortunately for Scot, Razor saw it coming.

"Uh oh!" His reflexes were faster than the beam of pink light, and Razor ducked, causing the beam to fly above him into the hall.

**A hallway**

"This is some priceless beer." Logan said to Warren. The grizzled Canadian feral was holding a six-pack. "I can't believe we finally get to drink it at last."

"Yeah." Warren grinned. "What a great day. Hey, what's that?"

"Huh? AAAGH!!!" A pink beam of light, Scott's optic blast, hit the six pack, and Logan, hard, causing him to go through a wall.

"Your aim is trash, just like your car!" Kid Razor's voice jeered from the Common Room.

"Logan, you okay?" Warren blinked.

"**_SHADES!!!!!_**" Logan roared. Warren yelped in fright and ran into the nearest room.

"Hey!" Storm's voice exclaimed from inside.

"I'll explain later!"

**The Common Room**

"Uh oh." Scott yelped.

"Oh, you gonna die now, Summers." Razor smirked as he walked calmly to the piano and sat on it. "You are so going to get it.

"**_SHADES, YOU BLASTED SOME PRICELESS BEER!!!!! NOW I'M GOING TO TAKE IT OUT OF YOUR HIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_**" Logan ran towards Scott, claws unsheathed, eyes glowing red, screaming for Summers blood.

"Uh oh!" Jenny, Tigra, Sunspot, Beast, and Rogue moved to hold him back.

"We can't stop him!" Hank exclaimed.

"Run, Scott!" Jean screamed.

"ZOINKS!!!" Scott screamed, and tried to run for his life, resulting in him running around in circles. Thor walked in, head pounding.

"Oh, my head…what?" Thor blinked as he saw the X-Men and Avengers that had super strength try to hold a cursing and roaring Logan from a panicking Scott. Thor gasped and ran to help his comrades.

"Calm, feral one!"

"I don't think we're allowed here again anytime soon, huh?" Razor asked Jean.

"Absolutely not!" Jean snapped.

"Ahh, you know you want me." Razor smirked.

Well, the insanity is coming to an end! What madness will happen next? Will the Avengers been seen again? What madness does the future hold? Find out soon! This is L1701E, saying thanks for reading!


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